Two young men tied the knot in a rare South African gay wedding in KwaDukuza (Stanger) on Saturday.
In what was described as the town’s first gay marriage, Tshepo Modisane and Thoba Sithole, both 27, walked down the aisle in front of 200 guests at the Stanger Siva Sungam community hall.
The wedding was a jubilant, exciting affair, attracting even uninvited members of the local community.
Thoba, a Joburg-based IT specialist, is from Shakaville, KwaDukuza and Tshepo an audit manager at PwC. They have known each other for years and dated on and off, before stabilising their relationship.
Now that they are wedded, they will take on the double-barrelled surname of Sithole-Modisane. The couple appeared to enjoy the support from the community, family and friends.
“Thoba is a really nice guy, very fun and outgoing,” said Loyiso Xaba, a family friend.
Another wedding guest, Bongani Sibisi, said: “They are an inspiration and step in the right direction.”
“This is my first wedding of this kind,” said Pastor Tankiso Mokwena, who married the couple.
In an interview on gay lifestyle website mambaonline.com, Thoba said about the relationship: “Since we are both men we have decided that neither of us will pay lobolo. The most we will do is to buy gifts for our parents as a sign of appreciation for raising us.”
The couple are reportedly planning to have children through a surrogate.
“Family is important to us and that is the number one reason why we want to have children,” said Thoba.
“We also want our children to grow up in an environment where they are loved greatly by both parents who appreciate them.”
Tshepo said one of the reasons they chose to be so open was that they “hope to inspire people out there who are still struggling to come to terms with their sexuality”.
“We see no reason to hide in darkness as if there is something to be ashamed about.
“Our marriage is largely symbolic and a sign that black gay men can commit and build a family through a happy and loving marriage,” he said.
When boys of the Shan tribe undergo the ritual “Poi Sang Long”, the focal point lies in, what in the Western world would be described as, “feminine values”. They are dressed up in bright colours and adorned with make-up. The aim is to mimic the young Prince Siddhartha before he became Lord Buddha. Even though the purpose of the ritual is to show that the boys are on their way to become mature and responsible men, it is loaded with aesthetic values and free from any physical trials. This is what sets it apart from other typical male rituals. By Ken Bamberg
Wojciech Kruczynski ”Reine” Lofoten, Norway
The First Amendment does not protect you from:
- Criticism: If you’re a comedian who makes a bad rape joke, people are allowed to point out that you’re not funny as well as an asshole.
- Shame: If you tweet something racist about President Obama on your public Twitter account that’s connected to your first and last name, people are allowed to say that is bad.
- The Right to Anonymity: If you take creepy photos of women without their consent and post them on Reddit, people are allowed to try and figure out who you are and post your information on the internet. No one is entitled to anonymity. It’s up to you whether to make it easy for people to find you.
- Mockery: If you put yourself out there that means your peers (and news outlets) have the right to LOL and comment.
- Consequences: If you publicly express yourself in a manner that is offensive, hurtful, or just plain dumb, strangers might contact your friends/family/school/employer and tell them what you did. That is not infringing on your right to free speech; it’s pointing out how you choose to exercise that right. Like the rest of the federal constitution, the First Amendment protects us from the government, not from private companies, which may be able to fire or otherwise punish you for stuff you say, even if it’s outside of work. The laws protecting the free speech of private employees vary from state to state, aside from specifically protected speech like labor organizing. Here are some guidelines for public employees and students.Casually bringing this back
Back in the day, football player Rosey Grier “came out” as a male needlepointer. He even published a book on it (I have it). This was such an earth-shattering event in ‘70s pop culture that even today, when I talk about women and knitting, people like to remind me that Rosey Grier did it, too. (No, he did NEEDLEPOINT, people!) Not sure it elevated the yarny crafts in the eyes of men, but it did get some folks thinking, at least. Back in the ‘70s, wall hangings were an important part of every home, but these days there isn’t much use for needlepoint. Grier should have learned to knit.
— Guest Editor from BUST, Editor-in-Chief Debbie Stoller